After moving continents this summer and living in various different accommodations (and out of suitcases for nearly a month) my life routines were been pretty much lost. At first it was fine, even good, to be unfettered by have-tos and regular activities but it soon grew tiring and I noticed my stress levels rising. I assumed everything would “go back to normal” when the children started school. For them, it mostly did. After two more weeks of feeling unsettled I started to worry. I found myself feeling anxious over things I normally would take in my stride, I woke in the mornings feeling unrested, I started finding it more difficult to concentrate and realised I was getting upset more easily than usual. When I first noticed these things I felt even worse as I worried what could be causing it all! It slowly came to me that I wasn’t taking good care of myself. I was caring for my children but forgetting about myself. I has very little structure to my days as a result of lots of meetings and one-off resident-in-a-new-country stuff but I wasn’t spending as much time in my spiritual disciplines, I wasn’t using the various practices that helped me stay balanced, and the only time I was outdoors was when I was rushing from one place to another. I wasn’t just forgetting to do this thing or another that helped me, rather I had forgotten they even existed.

I hate strict timetables and routines sap me, but at the same time I need to help myself remember what keeps me healthy emotionally, physically and spiritually. Discipline doesn’t necessarily mean we have to do things exactly the same for ever and ever, but I think it does set our mind to manage our body. Being disciplined means making intentional choices.

Downs asks us today to consider an area of our life where we could be more disciplined. For me this is my writing. I do need to get back to my regular habits to take care of myself well, but even when I’m operating well, I frequently sideline my writing. Even though writing brings me joy and I feel God wants me to practice it, I can make excuses to do other things. (I think we’ve talked about this in past weeks.) I choose to be more disciplined in my writing. Choosing to be disciplined, to pursue health and wellbeing, and practicing the gifts God’s given us, that’s the brave thing, right?